The sun was still shining as I parallel parked in front of the brick three flat. The ride to Jack’s dad’s in Irving Park had been the longest I’d ever taken. Still shaken by my awkward introduction meeting of his mother, I didn’t have anything to say. Jack and I barely uttered two words to one another.
I turned off the engine and looked Jack directly in the eye. God, I was attracted to him—so attracted that I couldn’t possibly scold him for making me feel so uncomfortable at the Laundromat in Melrose Park. That said I had to say something. Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice… well, you know the rest.
“Is there anything I need to know before I meet your father?” It was an earnest question. I couldn’t take any more surprises.
“No,” Jack replied as he unbuckled his seat belt. “Dad and Stan’ll love you.” With that, Jack exited the vehicle. Huh?
I jumped out and ran to catch up with him. He had nearly reached the stoop.
“Who’s Stan?” I asked.
“Dad’s partner”
“Oh,” I replied. “Wait a minute. I thought your Dad was an office manager. He owns his own business as well?”
Jack let out a loud (and rather uncivilized) laugh as he rang the doorbell.
“Stan’s not dad’s business partner.” He annunciated his words as though he were speaking to mentally challenged four-year old. “He’s dad’s life partner.”
“Your Dad’s gay?”
“Duh”
And with that, Jack’s father—we’ll call him Rodney—answered the door.
“Welcome, boys, c’mon in!”
The man had the worst lisp I ever heard. And even worse clothing. He could have been an extra on "Three's Company." Mr. Roper would have mistaken him for Jack Tripper’s gay lover.
Suddenly, Stan emerged from behind Rodney. So that’s what happened to Tripper’s friend Larry. All he needed was to throw on an ascot, and we could all hop on over to the Regal Beagle and have a gay old time.
Any anxiety I felt as a result of the Laundromat incident immediately left my body. A smile spread across my face. This was going to be an entertaining evening.
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